On the cover of Robert J. Ringer’s 1973 book Winning Through Intimidation is a tortoise with a simple message: Read this book and start winning today.

The word intimidation unsettles people. It sounds aggressive, almost manipulative. But Ringer’s point is different: it’s not about intimidating others. It’s about refusing to be intimidated by illusions.

And that’s the grit lesson here: most “success advice” isn’t built on reality. It’s built on comforting myths. If you want to play the game and win, you need to tear those myths down first.

Ringer begins with demolition. His argument is simple: before you can build a philosophy that works, you have to clear out the junk that doesn’t.

He goes after two of the most popular success myths:

These are the cornerstones of pop success culture. They’re repeated so often that they’ve hardened into clichés. We’re told to keep smiling, stay positive, and put in longer hours than everyone else. Eventually, we’ll be rewarded.

But the truth? The “eventually” never comes for most people. They cling to hope while reality chews them up.

The problem isn’t that positivity and effort are bad. The problem is that they’ve been sold as causes of success when they’re really just side effects.

We all know someone who’s endlessly cheerful. They shake hands firmly, smile from ear to ear, and tell you everything is great. But beneath the surface, nothing is working.

That’s because PMA doesn’t come from mirror talk or fake optimism.

It comes from preparation.

When you’ve studied your craft, refined your technique, and built competence, confidence follows naturally. You don’t have to pump yourself up. You walk into the room already knowing you belong.

Optimism without preparation is self-delusion. It collapses the moment reality pushes back.

Here’s where Ringer introduces his first major insight:

The way to sustain a positive attitude is by assuming failure.

At first, that sounds backwards. But think about it.

In sales, in business, in life, most opportunities don’t close. Too many variables are outside your control: shifting priorities, hidden agendas, third-party opinions that derail everything. If you go into each situation expecting a win, repeated failure crushes your belief in yourself.

But if you walk in prepared, confident in your ability, and realistic enough to assume most attempts won’t succeed, then failure no longer surprises you. It no longer shatters your posture. Rejection becomes the baseline.

Ringer called this “The Theory of Sustenance of a Positive Attitude Through the Assumption of a Negative Result.”

It’s a mouthful, but the principle is simple:

That shift allowed him to endure dozens of failures and still stay sharp enough to seize the handful of opportunities that did close.

He put it into practice and his income skyrocketed. Not because he won every time, but because he had built a system for surviving the grind of losing.

You prepare for long-term success by being ready for short-term failure.

That’s not just philosophy. That’s grit.

If you work in fintech or finance, you already have too many tabs open and not enough time.

Fintech Takes is the free newsletter senior leaders actually read. Each week, we break down the trends, deals, and regulatory moves shaping the industry — and explain why they matter — in plain English.

No filler, no PR spin, and no “insights” you already saw on LinkedIn eight times this week. Just clear analysis and the occasional bad joke to make it go down easier.

Get context you can actually use. Subscribe free and see what’s coming before everyone else.

Sign Up Free

The second myth Ringer takes down is the notion of “hard work.”

We’ve all heard it: success is about outworking everyone else. Get up earlier. Stay later. Grind harder.

But Ringer points out what we’ve all seen: effort alone doesn’t guarantee results.

He illustrates it with his Uncle George, who owned a corner grocery store. George worked 10 to 15 hours a day, year after year. He was honest. He was reliable. He kept his nose to the grindstone. And yet, he never became wealthy.

What did George get for all that work? Not freedom. Not wealth. Just age.

We all know an Uncle George, maybe in our family, maybe in our workplace, maybe even in our own past. Someone who did everything “right” by the myth, yet never broke through financially.

The lesson?

Hard work is relative. What feels hard to you may be easy to someone else.

Hard work eventually hits diminishing returns. Push too far and fatigue erodes effectiveness.

Hard work without strategy isn’t a formula. It’s just motion.

By shattering these myths, Ringer freed himself to build a philosophy that worked.

He learned:

That’s how he moved from frustration to clarity. From endless grind to meaningful results.

And that’s the invitation for us, too: before you add more to your playbook, strip away what doesn’t hold up under pressure. Stop clinging to myths. Build on principles that can survive reality.

This is only Chapter One.

In Chapter Two, Ringer begins the construction phase. He replaces the myths with five foundational theories, including the cornerstone of his entire philosophy: The Theory of Reality.

It sounds simple: Reality isn’t the way you wish things to be. It’s the way they are.

But as Ringer points out, most people don’t live that way. They pay lip service to reality, but in practice they ignore it. And that refusal to face reality is the single biggest reason most people fail.

👉 In next week’s Gritletter, we’ll break down what the Theory of Reality means and why acknowledging it is the first step to building a system that actually works.

Facing reality is the first step. Building on it is where grit begins.